Unhappy

The beginning phases of preparation were fine. The person I was co-teaching with was okay. He was a bit eccentric and loud but we both had the best interest of students at the forefront of our task. I was still feeling like this could work.

The first few weeks of the school year were good. Students were getting used to their new class and my partner and I were working well together. I still was not used to having to share a space all of the time. Things eventually started to become tense.

There began to be a bit of a power struggle. I felt as if my partner was trying to completely take over the instructional time during classes. He began to lead students through lessons much more than I did. This was not a major thing for me because I was able to provide support for students as they were working in class. I did, however, begin to feel as though my input was not valued.

My co-teachers habits begin to bother me even more over the next few months. The loud music and lack of cooperation began to wear on me. I would frequently spend my conference period walking around the perimeter of the building. I would think of possible solutions and pray for a change in my current situation. This was the first time in my educational career that I was unhappy.

I spent a lot of time thinking about ways to change my circumstances. I thought of applying for a transfer, applying for jobs in different school districts, and even going to grad school. My mind was all over the place and it began to affect me deeply. Something had to give.